Saturday, February 25, 2006

homeless but home again

well we have been back in santa barbara for almost a month. still looking for a home, but having a roof over our heads thanks to the gracious generosity of friends. the house hunt has taken way longer than I'd anticipated, but thankfully Jack, Diana and Santiago are in Argentina and needing a house/pet sitter so we're on our way to tend gardens, chickens, snakes, mice, turtles, fish and a dog.

crossing our fingers that this might turn out to be our new house, so if anyone is seeing this, send us your good vibes around 2 pm tomorrow when i will hopefully find out if it's ours or not. we're meeting the owners and seeing if they like us and my credit report.

other than an insane amount of time-consuming house and preschool hunting and also the ever present trying to work without childcare, being back has been great. seeing our friends and being in this glorious sunny weather has been tonic for the soul. interesting to see what has changed here and what has stayed the same. most of it is probably changes within my own perceptions really. above all, i still carry the gratitude in my heart for being back home and am riding the waves of this transition with a positive outlook.

the return has been good for sophia, she is really happy to be back, but it's also been a lot of transition for her. and i am learning to forgive myself for that too. parents can be really really hard on themselves for their choices and i am no exception. i look forward to the calm that will hopefully settle back around our lives soon.

until then, it's springtime here and everything is blooming.

lupin growing on the roadside >>

"Spring has returned. The earth is like a child that knows poems."- Rilke