lifting heavy rocks

This weekend, we found time for a day at the beach: jumping in the waves, making killer sand castles and braiding seaweed bracelets. What a gift of reconnection to the things that matter most to me: my daughter, this beautiful earth, moving my body, and creating things with my hands.

So in that same spirit, in case you didn't notice already, I spruced things up around here a bit! A facelift for my blog as I have been inspired lately by some really great blogs, and also feeling a little less than creative in my work, so I want to get back to this outlet, among others.

Also (cringe) I am starting to add some advertising. Lemme know if it bugs you. I am finding moms out there who make a living for their families simply by the advertising on their blogs. And they are doing hella creative cool stuff, blogging about it, and having a blast. With children in tow. So here's my stab at it. I know nothing about building a readership, but my pal Laureen does, so maybe I can pick her brain!!

So stay tuned to cool new things here, and also check out some of these cool blogs on my links at the left (not the right anymore, phew, such change)!!

Having a sister

In case you missed it in the last post, Sophia has now met her half sister Bianca. Bianca is 7, lives in Denmark. She and Sophia share 2 of the most distinctive things about themselves: an on-again/off-again traveling Dad and severe eczema resulting from wheat and dairy allergy. Likely the two things they will wish they could change about themselves. Now they have just met someone who shares their exact own pain.

They've not met in the past for two reasons, what with that giant Atlantic separating them and then because the mother was very upset when Riccardo had another child with another woman, and she was reticent to even tell Bianca about Sophia, let alone meet us. But each girl, both an only child of a single mother, have longed so desperately for a sibling and for simply "more" family. We convinced Maria (Bianca's mom) to let the girls meet when they came to the US for a visit this month. We had one weekend together last week, and are about to have another tomorrow. Then they will return to Denmark and we will miss them too, along with Riccardo, who will go back to Europe for another 8-9 months.

We all got along very well. At first there was the obstacle that neither girl expected, which was the language barrier. Bianca has learned a scant few words in English thus far, and we tried to learn a little Danish in a 30 minute crash course, but of course none of it stuck when we met them. Both girls had expectations of a sister, which did not include not being able to talk to each other, so they were a little unsettled by that. But Bianca started picking up English like a wildfire, which was great.

After that, it was just intense. Very, very big emotions. It was either a super fun and exciting big sisterly love-fest, or then just one small thing, a stubbed toe, or finding out the sherbert at the ice cream store on the wharf had dairy in it, and each girl would take turns bursting into tears and absolute meltdown. Feelings were raw and at the surface. For both, this is just what they have always wanted, to spend fun, quality time with both of their parents together, as well as with a sister. But it was a true testament to the tricky nature of getting exactly what you've always wished for. It was so overwhelming for Sophia, combined with too much sugar and no napping all weekend. She was maxed out. I've been brain dead all week, vegging in front of the TV every night after work.

And we're about to do it again this weekend too. Whoosh. I am not sure I am ready for it, but we'll manage. And then they will all go away and we will miss Daddy for a while, probably have potty accidents for a few weeks (just Sophia, I hope, but who knows about me!!), and then we will get back to our nice quiet life, just a mama and her girl. Like we always are.

Interesting final note, I asked Sophia this week if she wished she had a daddy that was always here with us. She first said yes, and said "because then mommy you wouldn't have to do everything and you wouldn't have to pay for everything." Not sure where and how she picked up on the money thing...so other than me being sad that finances have invaded her little brain on some level, I was so touched that she understood or empathized a little how it is for me. But then, to add to the moment, she said "but usually I like it when it's just you and me." You could have knocked me over with a feather! I've never considered that maybe she is happy with it this way. I am always angst and guilt ridden worrying about this weird life I've set up for her, worrying about needing to fill the daddy gap, etc. But maybe, just maybe, sometimes she doesn't feel a gap at all.

Ahhh....

flickr site

I started posting photos to flickr.com and so far only using the free service. I like it because it's easy to upload photos in batches. It's supposed to be compatible with my blog site, but until I figure that out, here are some recent photos of us:

Check it out if you want!

Photo above is Sophia with her half sister Bianca, age 7, who lives in Denmark. The two girls met for the first time this weekend (July 21-22, 2007) and will have one more weekend together next week. Pretty intense but fun time was had by all!

~

One sunny day...

Dragon Riders

As most who know me know, I've been involved in an arts workshop/parade every year for about 14 years around the time of the Summer Solstice. It's a rejuvenating, exhilarating experience for me to create art bigger than myself, using just my hands...a land where there is no copy, paste or undo.

Sophia of course has been in the parade all her life. I met her dad there and the creative energy coursing thru us at this same season brought a life into being, 4 years ago.

So this year, Sophia designed her own float. Inspired by the Eragon stories, she wants to be a dragon rider. So mama is making not one but 4 dragon sculptures for Sophia and her friends to ride on. Sophia is our only "boy" character, all her other friends are going to be princesses. But that's my girl!! (little white kid in the photo above, short hair - "like Eragon")

Below is a story I wrote on it for the local paper. More photos here.

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When asked what she wanted to make for Solstice this year, 4 year old Sophia Smith-Morrison told sculptor mom Laura Smith that she wanted to ride on the back of a dragon. Sophia proceeded to demonstrate with her hands how she wanted the dragon's mouth to open & close, and for cardboard fire to come out of its mouth. After being a passive participant in the parade for her first 3 years, Sophia designed her first float at the ripe old age of 4!

At 3 months of age, Sophia rode along with mom, wrapped up in a sling carrier, which Laura made from the same fabric as her own costume, and they danced up State Street together. At age 1, 2 & 3, Sophia napped thru the parade, in a stroller decorated as a Pegasus, a flower, and a clownfish respectively. This year, she will ride atop a dragon of her own design, along with many of her friends. Sophia prefers the "Eragon" style costume, while many of her friends have chosen princess or knight attire. The float will be comprised of 3-4 large dragon sculptures which will seat 2 children each. Other costumes include carry along dragons (hobby horse style) which will be ridden by older children on skates, roller blades and scooters, as well as dragon costumes for parents who will carry their infant "riders" on their backs.

While Laura and Sophia are Solstice "old-timers" (mom has been both on the staff and the Board of Directors of Solstice in the past), they have created the ensemble this year side-by-side with another family who is brand new to the Solstice experience. The Erringers, mom Anu, dad Alan, daughter Katja (age 5) and son Nicolas (age 2), have been instrumental to the creation of the 3 large dragon floats, as well as a dozen or more dragon masks and costumes. Alan has been in the parade once before, and offers his broad technical, engineering & construction skills to the float. The rest of the Erringer family are new to Solstice, and are having a transformative experience as their 2 year old son learns to use hand tools, and their 5 year old daughter opens up to the creative experience. Anu is enjoying overseeing the painting, papier-maching and production/decorating of dragon masks.

"Our children love having a "job" that they are responsible for. It's been a wonderful experience to watch our 5 year old daughter grow up a little by taking on the responsibility for carrying Dad's tool bag into Solstice each day, or being in charge of certain projects, like painting or papier maché," says Alan Erringer.

An interesting contribution this group of parents has made to the Solstice parade is the concoction of a non-toxic papier maché paste. The wallpaper paste typically used for large maché projects contains toxic chemical preservatives. The moms decided to research alternatives and tested several paste recipes, settling on a very simple, inexpensive mixture of cornstarch, salt and water. Traditionally, papier maché paste was made from just flour and water; preservatives have been added to prolong shelf life. This team took it one step further, since one of the children has a gluten allergy, they found a way to make an equally durable paste not only non-toxic, but also wheat free!

This ensemble offers many opportunities for those interested in getting involved with Solstice. We have had volunteers of all ages helping with this float, from toddler to teen to grandparents. If you've always wanted to come down and get creative at Solstice, come to the workshop and look for the Dragon Riders. We'll be sure to find something fun for you to work on! And we are starting to recruit adults to help pull the dragons on the day of the parade (the "Dragon Draggers" as we are calling ourselves). Come down, decorate a mask, whip together a costume, and enjoy Solstice dragon style!